August 2012
brightredkettle:
are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes
So there's only one channel in this motel,
madeofmetals:
This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street.
They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDS!” and all the tv kids would laugh.
Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn’t find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel,...
pizzaforpresident:
microwavepizzaoven:
shavingryansprivates:
what if instead of saying “go fuck yourself” we said “go drink a cup of milk”
that’s not a punishment
neither is fucking yourself
blackstanlee:
hannameth:
i just saw porn on my dash and gagged
gagged on what?
puppyluver43:
I don’t like morning people or mornings or people
2 tags
3 tags
therealhamster:
“i am so fucking done” i say as i pull myself from the oven. i have been cooked to perfection
July 2012
hotpielookedlikehotpie:
just because you love a character doesn’t mean they’re not a little shit
dontsaydarby:
What I never got in Tangled is how in the second to last scene when the guard busts in, the King and Queen understood that he meant their lost princess had returned. I mean SERIOUSLY. He could have meant ANYTHING.
3 tags
endlessmoe:
sticler:
sassy-gay-dust:
omg what if we named animals after the sound they make like in pokemon
“take the bark for a walk”
“hey could you feed the meows”
“hey look at all those moos”
woah thats one big PPFKEJGKRTLYKTPLFPLPTLTPPLLF
i think i like this idea
owl-recluse:
theotheropinion:
novocaine-girl:
theotheropinion:
I cannot say this enough. If you are comfortable with your body, or mostly comfortable with it and rarely experience discomfort with your biological sex, DON’T TRANSITION.
I cannot say this enough: if you’re being the trans* police, either shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down or go jump in a fucking lake. Seriously. fuck...
1 tag
1 tag
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albarndamon:
i think the greatest accomplishment in my life so far was being represented at the 2012 olympics as a piece of confetti
aeug:
i would lose weight but
i hate losing